Surprises vs Secrets – Strategies For Child Protection

Surprises v secrets for child protection

Surprises are things we will all find out soon

I know that it seems like I am still going on about the How do we protect our kids post but there was just so much info on child protection strategies in the comments that it would be remiss of me not to bring to attention some of the great techniques suggested.

A couple of you mentioned the importance of teaching your children the difference between surprises and secrets.

I thought that was a fantastic idea and one worthy of its own post.

The original idea came from Ally who is a social worker in child protection and I have paraphrased her slightly as well as added a few ideas of my own (I hope you don’t mind Ally?) however the general ideas remains the same and the credit must go to her.

It goes something like this…

Teach your children that we don’t keep secrets from one another, but we can keep surprises.

Surprises are things that people will all find out soon, like birthday presents, or Christmas presents, a new baby coming or a special dinner. Surprises can be fun and make you feel happy and excited.

Secrets are things that people tell you that you can never ever tell. Secrets can make you feel yucky or sad or frightened. Some people may even say that something bad will happen if you ever tell the secret.

Teach your kids that if anyone tries to tell them a secret or does anything else that makes them feel yucky or frightened then they need to tell dad or mum as soon they can as it is their job to protect you.

This needs to be adjusted as they get older so they can learn to keep confidences of other people but even then you can still tell them to keep the secret as long as it’s not about anyone being hurt or very upset.

Sometimes you still need to tell somebody else and it is mum and dad’s job to help you with that.

We can’t shelter our kids forever. But we can equip them with as much knowledge as possible to keep them as safe as possible…

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